i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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