Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
