so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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