I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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