She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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