Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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