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if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
