we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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