So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
