So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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