you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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