do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
