I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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