I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
