After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
