omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
These tits shall not be calmed
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
