Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Randomize
