Who wears a wallet chain?!
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize
