hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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