So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
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