I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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