Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
