so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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