absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
