Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
