No, you can still breathe under the balls.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
