you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
This baby is an asshole
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
