i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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