i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
