I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
