I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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