Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
