Screwed.edu
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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