Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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