you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
