Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
