I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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