He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize