S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
