Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Dick very happy bro
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
