Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I wear drunk well.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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