Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
