You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
