my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
