i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
