All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
