So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
