I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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