My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
