I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
